(b) in Parenthesis: "I just learned that farting at the dinner table is OK."

I attended a men's retreat last weekend and came away gaining some new truths about manhood. The weekend involved:

86 guys gorging on 24/7 snacks;
86 guys bundled as roommates in an inharmonious symphony of snoring;
86 guys playing selected guy games: dodge ball, sumo suit wrestling, human Foosball and a variety of fantasy role playing board games;
86 guys singing together praising God;
86 guys grappling with the concept of Grace;
86 guys sharing stories of life, faith and what it means to me a man.

During the closing session we were invited to stand up and share important takeaways from the weekend and, transparently and vulnerably, to ask for personal support and prayer from the fellow warriors. That's when one guy shared the following:

"I was glad to learn from one of my fellow sojourners that it is acceptable for men to fart at the table during meals."

So, whether this is a fact endorsed by the Society of Social Etiquette and Good Manners it gave me pause. What's the deal with guys' obsessive expressions about odoriferous gas, toilet moments and other body parts? Granted, I admit that the famous campfire fart tournament scene in Mel Brooks' Blazing Saddles is an all-time favorite and that I can't resist sharing a good burst of tasteless humor with the guys. Still, there must be something more with this natural event than meets the senses. Some research into the gaseous matter reveals accepted cultural uses in language, such as:

"I was just farting around." (nothing serious)
"Oops, I just had a brain fart." (forgot something)
"Hey soldier, roll up your fart sack and move out." (sleeping bag)

So, if it is such a common and seemingly nontoxic expression, why then do we avoid it with responses like:

"Timmy, did you just have a fluff?" (why a pillow reference?)
"Wow, that guy just let loose a raspberry." (come on, fruit?)
"OK, who let fluffy off the chain?" (animal bondage?)

Farts have been elegantly used in literature by such greats as Chaucer, Ernest Hemingway and Jonathan Swift...and DID NOT even make the cut for the late, great comedian George Carlin's famous list of Seven Dirty Words.

In summary: Language is rich with meaning, expression and emotion. Language uses words to create dialogue and enhance human interaction. God created man. He gave us a sense of humor to help cope with all the serious stuff life puts in our path. I take being a man, life and my path of faith seriously... and I have a gas any time I get to poke fun at how we tend to make too much about things that are really nothing more than a lot of hot air. So, go ahead, let it rip.

But what do I know; I'm just an old fart.