"I found a successful new pickup line."

They sit alone on the sidewalk. You walk past. They lay in filth. You walk past. They are ragged and scarred.  You walk past. Cigarette butts gather nearby. You walk past. They are infested with germs and disease. You walk past. They are worthless. You walk past.

The penny laying on the sidewalk. In the gutter. How many times have you looked right at it, considered its filth, its minimal value and decided to ignore it? To walk past? Given all we hear about swine flu, bird flu and the cornucopia of flu flus (plus the disintegrating value of our money) it would make sense to avoid them at all costs. True? Sure (if you're like me) there are those times when they appear in good condition (still have some luster), especially if it's a nickel, dime or quarter; then it's easier to risk touching it, picking it up and putting it harmlessly into your pocket (to say nothing about risking the humiliation of being seen picking it up). 

There's a rabbi I know who decided to exchange the stylish Armani robes worn where they gathered, for the tattered and dusty cloth, worn where they gathered. He and his band of brothers actually sought all the ones that were ignored by those who avoided picking up any filth, scars, germs, diseases or stigmas. 

Beggars. Vagrants. Bums. Degernates. Outcasts. Worhtless.

I wonder: if you added up all the single dirty pennies that this maverick, his dirty dozen and the countless followers since have picked up along the way...what do you think that their lives, if added up, would be worth? Maybe more than just a coined response. Maybe more than just a little change. Maybe more than we gave them credit for.

That's my two cents. 

A penny for your thoughts? 

Finally. If you want to see, hear and know the power of stopping and picking up a moment you might otherwise ignore watch this. It is one of the best 5:27 minutes you will ever "spend." If you do not smile and feel your heart leap you are likely already on life support. Go here right now: http://gizmodo.com/5231112/best-video-ive-seen-today-will-make-you-smile

For emphasis - (b)

"Thank you for my birthday presence."

Today is my birthday. 58. I am having a party all day. No one is attending. Everyone is (a) present. Boxes, paper and ribbon. Sizes, colors and shapes.

Today is my birthday. I love the messages I receive: Happy Birthday. Blessings. Joy. Celebrate you. Mom singing the birthday song on the phone (yearly tradition). Facebooked. Twittered. Carded. Loved. I love my gifts: Friends. Colleagues. Family. Writing. Caring. Work. Sharing. Walks. Bentley. Movies. Pizza. Ben & Jerry's Oatmeal Cookie Dough. Reading. Solitude. Praying. Reading. Listening. Reading. Hearing. Knowing.

 Today is my birthday. It's a day to remember the miracles: Birth. Wonder. Curiosity. Learning. Creating. Teaching. Giving it all a way. Giving it all away.

Today is my birthday. It's a day to thank everyone for the gifts of their time, their hearts, their wisdom, their critique, their firmness, their tenderness, their patience, their forgiveness, their friendship, their discipleship, their heart.

 Today is my birthday. Yesterday was my birthday. Tomorrow will  be my birthday. It's your birthday, too. Go on, open the presence.

 For empahsis - (b)

 

"I didn't see it coming."

So, how many times have you used or heard someone else use the expression: "I never saw it coming" or the same statement with the subject being he, she, they or we? I know that I have. It's such a perfect way to describe something that happens to someone or some group when an event occurs that totally catches you by surprise. The event, which might be reaaaaaaaaaally bad or reaaaaaaaaaally good, arrives unannounced. Pops up. A "ta dah" moment. Right? I don't think so.

I use three stories to illustrate the peculiar ambiguity of "I didn't see it coming."

I have been reading Judges in the Old Testament and Luke in the New Testament. Now, mind you, the Judges stories come right after the dust of Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Deuteronomy and Joshua. And man, from Day 1 EET (Eastern Eden Time) the pages are fraught with some of the most clueless people ever. AN ASIDE: for those of you that are rolling your eyes right now because 1) you have not read any of these, 2) you have read any of these, 3) you think I am getting ready to preach a sermon (well, maybe a little...) or 4) you are certain this is going to be a long read, hang in there. I'll get to it fast.

I am struck by the Israelites' seeming moments of "Huh? Where did this come from?" whenever God would spank them (big hands -- swing real painfully and wide) and then save them (big arms -- embrace real protectively and wide). I have a hunch they might have responded with, "Wow, we didn't see that coming." Good chance they were too busy "having a Baal" and jockeying for "(Asherah) pole position" to remember God's promise (His covenant no less) to protect them and love them and give them (everything) if they would just keep moving in the right direction. Absolutely. Positively. 

So, did they get it? No. Nah. Nope. Nada.

And then, get this, after He sent them to their room for a timeout (400 years making bricks and eating hummus) or had an enemy nation (or two) give them a major body slam...sure enough He'd come to their rescue when they cried out for His help and forgiveness. "OK, I'll save you and give you one more chance to move your lives in the right direction." Absolutely. Positively. 

So, did they get it? No. Nah. Nope. Nada.

And finally, there's always the Maverick Rabbi (no relation to Bart or Brett Maverick: most readers under 40 will need to Google them) and the Dusty Dozen. Luke 22 (not a caliber of the Old West). Passover dinner. Jesus tells them, yet again (after a series of "agains"), of his impending death and promised resurrection. So, one might make the chasm leap of discernment at this juncture that Jesus was about to go through some reaaaaaaaaally bad stuff, including his informing them that the worst snitch of all times, the one who would rat him out to the faith police, was right there at the table. Instead of taking this "subtle" clue and intervening to save him, they go right into arguing and posturing to find out "...which one of them was considered to be the greatest...." They were given all the information they needed to save him or prepare themselves for the horrors that lay ahead if they would think and act in the right direction. 

So, did they get it? No. Nah. Nope. Nada.

MY POINT: 

Since God wrote those great musical verses from Genesis, Don't go under the apple tree with anyone else but me, mankind has been given all the clues as to how to move our actions, decisions and lives in the right direction. We've read the books. Sung the songs. Gone to the meetings. Listened to the speeches. Gone to the wars. Gone to the memorials. Sought the prophets. Searched for the saviors. 

We've made some reaaaaaaaally bad choices. We've cried out for help. And as promised, He keeps delivering more chances for us to move in the right direction. Do you think that maybe these trying times are the perfect time for some reaaaaaaaally good (right) moves. 

OK, so what's the deal with the FedEx logo? 

Have you ever seen or noticed the "arrow" in the FedEx logo? No? Look carefully. Keep looking. It's there. Really. See it? Wow!! Now, I DARE YOU TO TRY AND NOT SEE THE ARROW EVERY TIME YOU NOTICE A FEDEX TRUCK PASING BY. THERE'S NO WAY. ONCE YOU'VE SEEN IT, YOU'LL ALWAYS SEE IT COMING. 

It's moving in the right direction.

For emphasis -  (b)

"I'd like to give you my timeshare."

About five years ago I made one of my (numerous) dumbest decisions: I purchased a timeshare in Mexico. Valerie and I were on a vacation in Puerto Vallarta with her family at a wonderful resort that my then brother-in-law had purchased a "fantastic" vacation package. As a way to get a 10% discount on the entire week at this resort of paradise plus (get this) discounts on the Paradise Extravaganza with Authentic Mexican Artists Performing the History of Mexico,  Fantasy Island Dinner Cruise and...last but certainly not least...the one-of-a-kind Snapping Turtle Farm - "All you have to do is listen to a 45 minute presentation. AND, you get a free breakfast, too."

Breathlessly and with unbridled enthusiasm, I signed us up. 

(IMPORTANT NOTE: Both Valerie and I made a pact that there was "absolutely nothing on this planet they could say that would convince us to buy one of these exploitive, hyped, valueless and might I say seniors oriented packaged scams.")

I am proud to report that we did not go for the ridiculously, impractical and over-priced 4 for 3 weeks timeshare package. We made the more prudent decision for the ridiculously, impractical and over-priced 3 for 2 weeks package. 

In the five years since we purchased the timeshare, I/we have used it...let me calculate...hold on...figuring..................once! And, oh yes, that was four weeks ago. 

THE POINT: I purchased it at a high cost. It sat there. I couldn't afford it at the time. It sat there. I didn't use it. It sat there. I lost everything in the interim. It sat there. I found the important things I had misplaced. I used it, shared it and love it.

Life gives us time to share: as leaders, followers, dreamers, friends, parents, children, wanderers. Our choices are the currency we use in deciding how we will spend the time we are given. Each day we are presented with numerous offers on where we should invest ourselves.  And we trans-act.

These days I am proud to report that I am going for the ridiculously, impractical and over-priced 1 for 1 moments: visiting my family wherever they are, seeking old friends, knowing new friends, spending mornings writing, walking with Bentley, serving high impact leaders and serving people who are simply looking for one more share of time.

Sign up.

For emphasis - (b)

 

"I just had a major altarcation."

ALTARED SYMBOLISM

Now the children of Israel heard someone say, “Behold, the children of Reuben, the children of Gad, and half the tribe of Manasseh have built an altar on the frontier of the land of Canaan, in the region of the Jordan; on the children of Israel’s side.” And when the children of Israel heard of it,the whole congregation of the children of Israel gathered together at Shiloh to go to war against them. Joshua 22:11-12

Talk about a slight misunderstanding! As the story goes, the Reubens (not the deli item) built an altar to praise God. They did this because they feared that just because they come from "the other side of the Jordan," that future Hebrew descendants would "take the river to symbolize" a boundary separating them from "the chosen people" who lived on the "right side of the Jordan" in the Promised Land. That they were not with "their kind" and as such building this altar was to "break faith with the God of Israel" and "turn away from the Lord and build an altar of rebellion against him...."

Naturally, the right thing to do for the other tribes was to gather a great army and go to battle with these heretics. Phew! Good thing that Papa Reuben was a convincing speaker; he was able to convey that their perception couldn't be farther from the truth.

There were, are and always will be altars. We build them, talk about them and gather around them. You can see them in any direction you turn:

Cars. Homes. Positions. Degrees. Portfolios. Churches. Politics. Jewelry.

So, be honest...was your first impression that I was attacking these items? Really.

I see it these ways:

CARS: being used to bring food to an elderly couple, a family in mourning or just a friend needing a ride.

HOMES: in Rwanda built to house widows and children of the genocide, Habitat neighborhood in urban Baltimore and the arms of a loving Father.

POSITIONS: face down on the ground weeping with gratitude in knowing that pain is the cost of joy.

DEGREES: 360. "Got ya covered."

PORTFOLIOS: the collection of dirty, seemingly worthless pennies I have picked up from the gutters along the way.

CHURCHES: made out of my words, my actions and beings outside the walls.

POLITICS: there's a fine line between the pig sty and the (prodigal) party. Luke 15:24

JEWELRY: for many years I searched for a pendant to wear. A symbol to represent my: Heart. Belief. Faith. Vision. Values. Journey. Me.

Visiting Victoria and Rick last year in Oregon, I found it. Simple. A lone tree. Leaves look a bit like clouds. And then I noticed that the trunck and branches reminded me of the first letter of the Hebrew word, Shema. The Shema is considered the most important prayer (recited twice daily) in Judaism: "Hear, O Israel: the Lord our God, the Lord is One."

That's my altarcation?

What's yours?

For emphasis - (b)

"OK, I admit that I am a pain in the Assimilation."

Still Crazy (and single) After all these Years.

For those of you who might have been confused (I got a number of messages asking if congratulations were in order and What's the deal with the marriage blog) by my Sunday post announcing "I got married on Thursday," I am actually still single, in the cultural sense. And per this "big news" I doubt that I will be getting a call to be the next contestant on The Bachelor (I can dream, can't I?).  My point was a moment of continued purging of some poisons from my past; my two previous marriages. Two amazing women. Two genuine, injured hearts. Two cases of my own mistaken identity. Masterful disguises. Crimes of passion. And the amazing power of a grace-full God who forgives, embraces and gives you another (and another) chance to get it right. 

What's in a Word?

I looooove C.S. Lewis. I just cannot consume enough of his writing and point of (life and faith) view. I am reading The Problem of Pain (might have something to do with the last post...just maybe). In the current chapter, he is speaking about the paradox between God, who is love and all that is good, and the condition of human wickedness.  He uses a phrase with a word that grabbed me: "...even Pagan society has usually recognised 'shamelessness' as the nadir of the soul." 

nadir (noun)

1. an extreme state of adversity; the lowest point of anything

2. the point below the observer that is directly opposite the zenith on the imaginary sphere against which celestial bodies appear to be projected

Then...he continues with another grabber: "In trying to extirpate shame we have broken one of the ramparts of the human spirit, madly exulting in the work as the Trojans exulted when they broke their walls and pulled the horse into Troy."

extirpate (verb)

1. Destroy completely, as if down to the roots

2. Pull up by or as if by the roots

3. Surgically remove (an organ)

Great words and powerfully disarming images he uses to convey the extremes expressed in the wickedness of our lives in "physical terms": 

- The lowest point of anything: been there, done that, do that?

- Destroying living things by pulling them out by the roots: been there, done that, do that?

That word, wickedness, gives many people (me, too) pause and feelings of shame. I want to stand up and say, "Hold on, I'm not a wicked guy. Really." And then just about the time I am ready to pull out pictures of me playing with my grandson, hugging Bentley and my visits with missionaries in Lebanon and Egypt Clive draws us closer into faith full arms:

"...if our depravity were total we should not know ourselves to be depraved,  and partly because experience shows us much goodness in human nature. Nor am I recommending universal gloom. The emotion of shame has been valued not as an emotion but because of the insight to which it leads."

nadir-ing + expirate-ing + wickedness  ÷  shame × insight = grace (to the power of One)

Put that in your pipe and smoke it. He did. 

(b)

"I got married on Thursday."

No, your invitation did not get misplaced.

 The ceremony was sparsely attended.

I was waiting behind closed doors, nervous with anticipation.

I had a butterflied stomach.

Pangs of anxiety.

Melancholy.

Tears.

Don Henley was brought in to perform the service. 

His words soared on the eagle wings.

For my wedding, I will dress in black
And never again will I look back
Ah, my dark angels we must part
For I've made a sanctuary of my heart

I looked down and noticed I was wearing my black t-shirt. My threadbare jeans showed skin through the denim above my left knee. I dressed for the man I am.

To want what I have 
To take what I'm given with grace
For this I pray
On my wedding day

I considered everything I forgot to bring to my previous weddings. Forgotten in the ceremonies of formal attire and makeup. Tears spilled over the crystalline rim down the rough goblet of my cheeks.

For my wedding, I don't want violins
Or sentimental songs about thick and thin
I want a moment of silence and a moment of prayer
For the love we'll need to make it in the world out there

I left the empty room where I was sitting. I remembered long walks on empty beaches near Muir Woods; bony sand fingers gripping, trying to pull me under. Gulls shaking their beaky grins, mocking my self-induced isolation.  

To want what I have
To take what I'm given with grace
For this I pray
On my wedding day
On my wedding day
I dream, and my dreams are all glory and light
That's what I've wanted for my life
And if it hasn't always been that way
Well, I can dream and I can pray
On my wedding day

Bentley stirs, then burrows and rearranges the chenille nest laying across my lap to feel the halogen's redemptive light. The room is chilly.   

So what makes us any different from all the others
Who have tried and failed before us
Maybe nothing, maybe nothing at all
But I pray we're the lucky ones; I pray we never fall
To want what we have
To take what we're given with grace
For these things I pray
On my wedding day
On my wedding day

Separated. Divorced. 

Alone and in sanctuary. 

The tuxedos returned.

The flowers taken home by others.

The littered memories gathered and disposed.

One photo album in someone's closet.

One photo album flowing downstream in Colorado.

There were bridges in the distance. I had wanted to walk together. 

I forgot to leave the ceremony,

and come home for dinner. 

Janine, I regret not coming home.

Valerie, I regret not coming home.

The ceremony is over. 

Thursday night I cooked rice for dinner.

For emphasis - (b)

"Give yourself a break from all those taxing things."

"Laugh and the world laughs with you; 

snore and you sleep alone."

Anthony Burgess

How do you spell relief from April 15th?  

c-o-n-s-t-i-pay-t-i-o-n?

r-e-fun-d-e-d?

Or are you like me (heaven forbid for numerous reasons of your precious sanity) and f-i-led an e-x-tension. Yep, I slept right through the process leading up till the home stretch. Granted I got 3/4 of the way there, but petered out in the end. But why, you might ask (actually, I know none of you are asking; it's just one of those rhetorical things writers can use to disguise split personality issues and/or spending 24/7 with a splotchy colored mini-hound). 

Fact is, the last 1/4 of the race I was in Dallas with my family and some friends spending a good part of the time laughing my as...posterior off. When I get around my mom, brother and sister it's like all the wires get crossed. All decorum, appropriateness and normalcy get replaced with all silliness, frivolity and moments of sheer guffaw. What a terrific word; guffaw. Billy (Webster) defines it:

1.	a loud, unrestrained burst of laughter.

–verb (used without object)

2.	to laugh loudly and boisterously.

Origin: 
1710–20  **(So, do you think it took 10 years to get the definition straight because they were laughing so hard??)

Here's the deal as I see it: It's the 16th. You have 364 days to file. Adequate time get deep into the rhythm and flow of this "down" economy. You can choose to join the millions who will create new ways to ramble in an organized state of chaos (I am not talking about New Jersey) enjoying instant gratification, and to exist in sustained frustration. 

Or, you can choose to join the millions who will create new ways to live in an organized state of chaos (I am talking about contentment) enjoying lifelong gratification, and to thrive in sustained jubilation.  

You can laugh all the way to the bank on that.

Filed away for the time. Being.

For emphasis - (b)